Wednesday 26 June 2013

Raw Power

First of all, many apologies for the delay in posting this final match report of the 2012/2013 season, a season which saw us move from our historic home of the Finsbury Leisure Centre to Coram Fields, a location which places us firmly in the Bloomsbury Set. The tardiness in getting this to you is unforgiveable, but a combination of work pressures and mid-Summer ennui (Je suis Thierry Ennui) has left this report unfinished and unwritten. Until now, that is.

The last Friday night match until September finished 6-3 to the Colours and the two teams lined up as follows:

Bibs: David, Steve, Liam (following a swap with Ian Geary), Ross (following Yev’s arrival), Phil, Paul, Ian Gough, Big Phil,

Colours: Yev (eventually), Simon Gas, Kiwi Nick, Bearded Nick, Andy, me, Liam (until half-time)

As you can see, there was a fair bit of chopping and changing which left some players with the philosophical trauma of deciding whether they had won or lost – if you score two goals for the winning team but are shifted onto the opposition midway through the game, are you both victor and vanquished? – although I think we can all agree that football was the real winner.

The notes which I hastily scribbled down after the game record that Yev, Liam and the Bearded Nick, who Ian seemed intent on goading for reasons unclear to all but himself, all appeared on the scoresheet. Following his traditional late arrival Yev’s contribution proved decisive with two (at least) trademark finishes, including the final goal of the campaign right at the death, as he rounded the keeper to touch into the empty net. Liam, a sort of Caledonian Lionel Messi, was in great form for both teams and it took some increasingly desperate defending from the Colours to fend off a late resurgence from the Bibs. Andy in particular was immense at the back (and in goal), while Simon Gas rolled back the years with a classy display that held the Colours’ shape even as they came increasingly under the proverbial cosh.

One of the Colours’ goals came after an unholy scramble which saw the ball ping off the back of a defender and into the path of (I think) Phil, who showed no sign of nerves and calmly steered past an exasperated Andy and into the far bottom corner.

Other notable incidents, at least from my memory, were some fresh air shots from at least two players (including me), an effort which Dave pushed onto the crossbar (me again) and a spectacular tumble which saw one of the players fall onto both knees in the manner of a GI in the film Platoon, (yep, that’ll be me again). The other outstanding memory of the match was Yev’s outburst toward the end as the ball careered off onto one of the neighbouring pitches for the umpteenth time. The group of sullen youths who were determinedly ignoring our exhortations to return the ball had proved irksome throughout proceedings, leaving an enraged Yev to declare – very loudly – that the young lads in question were terribly irritating and that ‘they just stand there like a [see you next Tuesday]’. Too true.

The end of season gala dinner dance took place in the curry house next to The Skinners Arms, somewhat to Simon Gas’ disappointment as he was hoping for a cold buffet in the pub. I can honestly say that it was the best Indian I’ve been out for in ages – the food was excellent, the staff were most hospitable (especially the statuesque Polish waitress who looked somewhat incongruous amongst the diminutive Bengali men) and the atmosphere was convivial without repeating the bellicosity of two years ago. Well done, everyone.

And what of Spizz, I hear you ask? Well, I am pleased to relay a confirmed sighting of the enigmatic post-punk icon from Yoko Ono’s Meltdown Festival, where Iggy and the Stooges played last week at the Festival Hall. Spizz was at the bar – obviously – without a ticket, (ditto) – and regaled my wife and I with a tale of the last time Iggy Pop had played at the Festival Hall, in 2008.

Spizz had joined the Lizard King on stage, whereupon the animated car insurance salesman had mistaken our Spizz for John Lydon. And so it came to pass that around five songs into last week’s set Iggy once more exhorted his audience to join him on stage and in amongst the hundred or so young people pogoing around Iggy was none other than Spizz, identifiable by his leather jacket, which bears the legend ‘Spizzenergi’, his trousers which bear the legend ‘Spizzenergi’ and an LED belt display that transmits the word ‘Spizzenergi’. Ticket or no, Spizz had got into the gig, reached the stage and started plugging his next gig on the 13thJuly. And then he fell over. Still, that’s rock n roll.

See you in September…